4 weeks and 5 weeks from today, my sons will graduate from college. Graduation is an integral part of my life every year at this time because I work at a college, mostly with senior students. Every year, I get a lump in my throat at some point during graduation weekend - all of those terrific young people going out into the world, whether they are ready or not
This time, I'm watching the process from the family side and I'm choking up months before the event. There are things I'm very much looking forward to, like no more tuition payments and yet I get teary-eyed when I get an e-mail from the colleges about the graduation weekend activities. I can only guess it is related to the renegotiation of roles and relationships that come with these big changes. We certainly moved into a new kind of relationship with our sons when they went off to college, but were still called upon at various times to be the parent. Now, we'll be able to be... well, I'm not sure what yet. They'll still be on our insurance for a while, and it is likely we'll be helping them out when possible with finances and transitions, and who knows when we'll actually kick them off our cell phone plan, but it still will be different.
We (especially me) find ourselves thinking and talking more about retirement. We're not there yet, but now hope to turn our financial focus toward that goal. The earliest I can retire will be in just over 5 years. I'm enjoying my work more than I have in many, many years, so it wouldn't surprise me if I stayed in the harness later, but am looking forward to getting to the point where it is a year-to-year decision. But, it does seem strange to be able to focus on what feels a bit selfish -- just us.
So, it is with mixed emotions that we approach this year's graduation season. Pray for all of us - especially the son who is approaching graduation with dread and anxiety. Life beyond college, I assure him, is a pretty fun place to be - even 32 years later!
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Thursday, March 22, 2012
End of a Chapter, But Not the Book
I've shared here the experience we've had with moving my parents to an apartment. The next installment of the story is the selling of their house, which is finally happening. Actually, given the market in their town, where a Navy base was recently closed, resulting in a lot of available housing in the area, we were fortunate to sell it in 6 months. The closing is tomorrow.
The emptying of the house has seemed endless. Besides all of the house stuff, there was my father's workshop and office and storage areas in the basement and a garage full of odds and ends. We actually didn't completely empty it -- rationalizing that some of the odds and ends we were leaving could be "useful" to the new owner (like the shelf unit with leftover cans of paint from the house doors and trim), the big folding table hanging on the garage wall, and the hedge trimmer.
Don and I paid our last visit to the house last Saturday. It was partly to retrieve just a few more things (a garden cart/wheelbarrow, a half-dozen boxes of various-sized trash bags, the wooden support for the birdbath which I should have taken last fall but which was frozen into the lawn all winter, an electric drill I don't think any of us had seen hanging on the end of the storage cupboards in the workshop, etc. Mostly, though, I think it was to say good-bye.
In a conversation with my parents after the visit, my Mom asked me if I felt sad. I said, "of course - we had a lot of fun times there!" Luckily that satisfied her and I didn't have to admit the sobbing crying jag I had while there. I couldn't have told her that I was really crying about how my parents are less and less able to take care of themselves, let alone a house. Or that I was crying for my own future elderliness.
So, the house chapter closes. The house is gone. There is now no one in my family living in the community where I grew up. The only thing left is a plaque honoring my father on the wall of the school where he was principal for many years and a handful of people who knew any of us.
But, the book is not finished, thanks to a large, extended family who is still close (not necessarily close by, but close). Many of us will be gathering for my father's birthday next week. My siblings are all talking this week about how to help my mother make efforts to be a bit healthier. We've got graduations to celebrate in two months, and anniversaries, and more birthdays, and an all-sibling camping trip planned for August. We'll keep writing memories.
And, of course, I'll keep knitting!
The emptying of the house has seemed endless. Besides all of the house stuff, there was my father's workshop and office and storage areas in the basement and a garage full of odds and ends. We actually didn't completely empty it -- rationalizing that some of the odds and ends we were leaving could be "useful" to the new owner (like the shelf unit with leftover cans of paint from the house doors and trim), the big folding table hanging on the garage wall, and the hedge trimmer.
Don and I paid our last visit to the house last Saturday. It was partly to retrieve just a few more things (a garden cart/wheelbarrow, a half-dozen boxes of various-sized trash bags, the wooden support for the birdbath which I should have taken last fall but which was frozen into the lawn all winter, an electric drill I don't think any of us had seen hanging on the end of the storage cupboards in the workshop, etc. Mostly, though, I think it was to say good-bye.
In a conversation with my parents after the visit, my Mom asked me if I felt sad. I said, "of course - we had a lot of fun times there!" Luckily that satisfied her and I didn't have to admit the sobbing crying jag I had while there. I couldn't have told her that I was really crying about how my parents are less and less able to take care of themselves, let alone a house. Or that I was crying for my own future elderliness.
So, the house chapter closes. The house is gone. There is now no one in my family living in the community where I grew up. The only thing left is a plaque honoring my father on the wall of the school where he was principal for many years and a handful of people who knew any of us.
But, the book is not finished, thanks to a large, extended family who is still close (not necessarily close by, but close). Many of us will be gathering for my father's birthday next week. My siblings are all talking this week about how to help my mother make efforts to be a bit healthier. We've got graduations to celebrate in two months, and anniversaries, and more birthdays, and an all-sibling camping trip planned for August. We'll keep writing memories.
And, of course, I'll keep knitting!
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Checking In
Yes, I've been a bad blogger. Every time I check in on one of the blogs I read regularly and the writer hasn't posted, I admit I get a bit huffy. Then I remind myself how bad I've been with my own blog (there's that inner critic again!).
So, I'm checking in. I'm here. I'm present, but busy. The semester is flying by and spring is almost upon us -- the daffodils are coming up! How have I been doing with my New Year's goals? Let's see:
Release
This one is hard. I'm pretty good about letting go of guilt related to keeping my house clean, but then things pile up. Sigh. I'm working at getting ready to let my sons stand on their own two feet, somewhat. I was determined to let them do their own taxes this year, for example. BUT, I invested in TurboTax software for the first time ever so that it would be easier for all of us. Then, circumstances dictated that I had to do one son's taxes for him in order to give the disc to the other son, after giving him a demonstration. Next year? Definitely they are on their own (I hope). Financially, I'm ready to let go, but they aren't so sure they want me to :) We're going to have to negotiate things like whether they will stay on our cell phone account, whether we'll ask them to pay the cost of their staying on our insurance plan, etc. It will be somewhat tricky, but we'll get there. So, "release" is a work in progress.
Presence
This one is a bit easier. I practice it by insisting that we don't have our computers open when we sit down to eat dinner each night, for example. And, by sitting and eating dinner even if we both put together our own plate of leftovers instead of a cooked meal. But, I'm sure there are other ways to keep working on this. For example, I haven't been very good about getting to yoga classes this winter, and I could really use that time to check out of everything else and be present with myself.
Planning
I've been focused on this in fits and starts. For example, I found myself holding off on making travel plans to our sons' graduations. I made the hotel reservations months ago and then lost the piece of paper I noted the information on and had to call around to find out where I'd made them! But, we've got the plane and hotel reservations for the more intensive travel to one graduation, and will have to start putting some thought into the one that is easier to get to.
I've also been getting after some of the filing that is necessary to complete before meeting with a financial advisor. I'm getting there.
Knitting
I've been knitting up a storm whenever I get a chance. I've knit a bunch of faux-felted mittens to put away for next Christmas. I also knit 3 pairs of angora (Lush) fingerless mitts -- 2 pair for a friend who bought the yarn and asked me to make them for her and a 3rd pair for the pianist at choir. I've got enough left to make a pair for me when I get around to it.
I attended Spa, Knit, and Spin with a friend. I was pretty conservative in my purchases, but did come home with a few things:
The purple is Quince & Co. Tern (wool and silk) for a Piper's Journey shawl, purchased at Purl Diva. We also stopped at Halcyon in Bath where I bought something for a gift that I'll have to share after it is given. The blue is from Woolen Rabbit, a hand-dyer in New Hampshire to be used in a couple of Ann Hanson patterns. The red fiber in the baggie is silk muwata, which are also called silk hankies. When I attempt to use them, I'll have to show you how I'll be knitting them into mittens (the theme of the year so far seems to be mittens!). The gray is alpaca and silk for spinning from Portland Fiber Gallery - my one unplanned purchase. And the soap was a freebie from Spunky Eclectic from whom I purchased the muwata.
I've started the shawl, but other than that am still working on mittens. Funny how this has been one of the mildest winters in many years, and yet, here I am knitting mittens!
So, I'm checking in. I'm here. I'm present, but busy. The semester is flying by and spring is almost upon us -- the daffodils are coming up! How have I been doing with my New Year's goals? Let's see:
Release
This one is hard. I'm pretty good about letting go of guilt related to keeping my house clean, but then things pile up. Sigh. I'm working at getting ready to let my sons stand on their own two feet, somewhat. I was determined to let them do their own taxes this year, for example. BUT, I invested in TurboTax software for the first time ever so that it would be easier for all of us. Then, circumstances dictated that I had to do one son's taxes for him in order to give the disc to the other son, after giving him a demonstration. Next year? Definitely they are on their own (I hope). Financially, I'm ready to let go, but they aren't so sure they want me to :) We're going to have to negotiate things like whether they will stay on our cell phone account, whether we'll ask them to pay the cost of their staying on our insurance plan, etc. It will be somewhat tricky, but we'll get there. So, "release" is a work in progress.
Presence
This one is a bit easier. I practice it by insisting that we don't have our computers open when we sit down to eat dinner each night, for example. And, by sitting and eating dinner even if we both put together our own plate of leftovers instead of a cooked meal. But, I'm sure there are other ways to keep working on this. For example, I haven't been very good about getting to yoga classes this winter, and I could really use that time to check out of everything else and be present with myself.
Planning
I've been focused on this in fits and starts. For example, I found myself holding off on making travel plans to our sons' graduations. I made the hotel reservations months ago and then lost the piece of paper I noted the information on and had to call around to find out where I'd made them! But, we've got the plane and hotel reservations for the more intensive travel to one graduation, and will have to start putting some thought into the one that is easier to get to.
I've also been getting after some of the filing that is necessary to complete before meeting with a financial advisor. I'm getting there.
Knitting
I've been knitting up a storm whenever I get a chance. I've knit a bunch of faux-felted mittens to put away for next Christmas. I also knit 3 pairs of angora (Lush) fingerless mitts -- 2 pair for a friend who bought the yarn and asked me to make them for her and a 3rd pair for the pianist at choir. I've got enough left to make a pair for me when I get around to it.
I attended Spa, Knit, and Spin with a friend. I was pretty conservative in my purchases, but did come home with a few things:
The purple is Quince & Co. Tern (wool and silk) for a Piper's Journey shawl, purchased at Purl Diva. We also stopped at Halcyon in Bath where I bought something for a gift that I'll have to share after it is given. The blue is from Woolen Rabbit, a hand-dyer in New Hampshire to be used in a couple of Ann Hanson patterns. The red fiber in the baggie is silk muwata, which are also called silk hankies. When I attempt to use them, I'll have to show you how I'll be knitting them into mittens (the theme of the year so far seems to be mittens!). The gray is alpaca and silk for spinning from Portland Fiber Gallery - my one unplanned purchase. And the soap was a freebie from Spunky Eclectic from whom I purchased the muwata.I've started the shawl, but other than that am still working on mittens. Funny how this has been one of the mildest winters in many years, and yet, here I am knitting mittens!
Monday, January 30, 2012
A Lovely Day Off
Yes, the skies are low and threatening snow, but it is Monday and I have the day off, so it is very lovely to me. Jan Plan came to a roaring finish last week (though two colleagues have a very big event happening today) and everyone is exhausted and ready for a short break. Classes don't start until Wednesday, so several of us have taken today off for R&R (or, at least, R). Don and I cleaned the house on Saturday evening, so all that is left are things I need to get done by myself, such as the bills :) My select group of readers know, however, that a puttering day at home is the most restful thing I can think of doing.
Knitting has figured interestingly into the weekend. A family at church has two daughters, around 10 and 7, who are interested in learning to knit. The mother doesn't knit (yet) and also wanted to learn. The 11-year old, M, already knows how to knit, but not how to read and follow a pattern, etc. We had our first "lessons" yesterday and I'm happy to report that the two new knitters left with several completed rows of knit stitches and M learned a new cast on and had an introduction to reading a pattern. They've gone off to practice for the week and hopefully we can meet at our LYS next weekend to pick out yarn for a hat for M to knit and something for Mom and S to knit washcloths with. I think I'll also encourage M to look at top-down sweater patterns as I'm sure she'll finish the hat in a flash.
Other than that, I did frog the baby sweater and moved up a couple of needle sizes and started a bigger size of the pattern with the result of a sweater that actually could be worn by a real baby. I was reassured in this action when I found that I had three balls of the main color when I thought I only had two. I think I'll have enough to make a hat to go with it.
I'm also making progress on a birthday or graduation present for my son's girlfriend. I know that the spring and summer are going to be inordinately busy (though there will be travel time that will benefit my knitting) and I don't want to be caught short.
Today, my puttering needs to include cleaning up my desk and fiber room. I actually don't have a sweater on the needles at the moment and am itching to start one, but have been holding myself off until I could get a bit more organized. I have the three projects going, but am very close to finishing two (the baby sweater and the Gaptastic Cowl). I can do a pair of Faux-Felted Mittens to keep myself at bay, but those don't take long. Oh, I do have two pairs of socks I could work on that have been started but put aside. OK, I'll hang on for a bit longer.
Then, on Wednesday, we'll start the spring semester, which promises to be a full, fast ride to May. So, today I'll putter and gather a bit of steam.
Knitting has figured interestingly into the weekend. A family at church has two daughters, around 10 and 7, who are interested in learning to knit. The mother doesn't knit (yet) and also wanted to learn. The 11-year old, M, already knows how to knit, but not how to read and follow a pattern, etc. We had our first "lessons" yesterday and I'm happy to report that the two new knitters left with several completed rows of knit stitches and M learned a new cast on and had an introduction to reading a pattern. They've gone off to practice for the week and hopefully we can meet at our LYS next weekend to pick out yarn for a hat for M to knit and something for Mom and S to knit washcloths with. I think I'll also encourage M to look at top-down sweater patterns as I'm sure she'll finish the hat in a flash.
Other than that, I did frog the baby sweater and moved up a couple of needle sizes and started a bigger size of the pattern with the result of a sweater that actually could be worn by a real baby. I was reassured in this action when I found that I had three balls of the main color when I thought I only had two. I think I'll have enough to make a hat to go with it.
I'm also making progress on a birthday or graduation present for my son's girlfriend. I know that the spring and summer are going to be inordinately busy (though there will be travel time that will benefit my knitting) and I don't want to be caught short.
Today, my puttering needs to include cleaning up my desk and fiber room. I actually don't have a sweater on the needles at the moment and am itching to start one, but have been holding myself off until I could get a bit more organized. I have the three projects going, but am very close to finishing two (the baby sweater and the Gaptastic Cowl). I can do a pair of Faux-Felted Mittens to keep myself at bay, but those don't take long. Oh, I do have two pairs of socks I could work on that have been started but put aside. OK, I'll hang on for a bit longer.
Then, on Wednesday, we'll start the spring semester, which promises to be a full, fast ride to May. So, today I'll putter and gather a bit of steam.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Jan Plan
For 30 years of my life, January has meant Jan Plan to me. Jan Plan is the month-long term between semesters at Colby College. As a student, it meant taking just one interesting class along with daily naps, cross-country skiing, and lots of reading and hanging out time. As an employee, it feels more like we cram a whole semester into 4 weeks and it is a race from start to finish. This year, and last year, I've added the responsibility of organizing and supporting a Jan Plan course for pre-med students. Most of the work comes in the fall, with the rest of it falling in the last 1 1/2 weeks of January. Here we go!
This weekend, however, we made no plans to go anywhere, except to attend the celebration of ministry that officially names our new priest as our parish rector. That was a truly moving, lovely eucharist services yesterday, followed by good food and fellowship. And, we even got a few leftovers to get us through the Pat's game this afternoon.
Knitting is spotty, but I did get to do some this weekend. At basketball games on Friday, I worked on the Gaptastic Cowl that I've been working on since Thanksgiving. It is easy to work on without looking, so it pretty much is relegated to when I need little distraction. The color is a bit darker than this picture -- a pretty teal color in Lambs Pride Bulky.
I (finally) finished the Japanese Vines scarf for Julie, my son's girlfriend. It blocked very nicely and is a pretty, soft green. I mailed it off to her in a box of things Nate left at home when he was here for Christmas.
I stopped by my LYS yesterday to pick up some mohair to make another pair of Faux Felted Mittens and, of course, found something on the sale table that caught my eye. I started on a baby sweater last night, but failed to do a gauge swatch, so it is coming out too small -- even for a baby sweater. I guess I need to start over and upsize my needles and size choice to compensate. The yarn is merino and silk (and machine washable!) and luscious. It is a free pattern from the blog of f.pea -- Supernatural Stripes.
I also got buttons yesterday for the Debbie Bliss sweater. With any luck I'll get them sewn on today and can wear it this week.
Other things accomplished this weekend are purchasing and installing a new phone (one with an answering system and big letters/numbers and a flashing light for missed calls - unlike the very cheap one we bought in November to replace the one whose display had ceased to function) and hanging our framed prints of Rocky Mountain College on the stair wall. Things not (yet) accomplished include doing my laundry and doing the bills :) But, I think I'll go rip out that baby sweater and start over.
This weekend, however, we made no plans to go anywhere, except to attend the celebration of ministry that officially names our new priest as our parish rector. That was a truly moving, lovely eucharist services yesterday, followed by good food and fellowship. And, we even got a few leftovers to get us through the Pat's game this afternoon.
Knitting is spotty, but I did get to do some this weekend. At basketball games on Friday, I worked on the Gaptastic Cowl that I've been working on since Thanksgiving. It is easy to work on without looking, so it pretty much is relegated to when I need little distraction. The color is a bit darker than this picture -- a pretty teal color in Lambs Pride Bulky.
I (finally) finished the Japanese Vines scarf for Julie, my son's girlfriend. It blocked very nicely and is a pretty, soft green. I mailed it off to her in a box of things Nate left at home when he was here for Christmas.
I stopped by my LYS yesterday to pick up some mohair to make another pair of Faux Felted Mittens and, of course, found something on the sale table that caught my eye. I started on a baby sweater last night, but failed to do a gauge swatch, so it is coming out too small -- even for a baby sweater. I guess I need to start over and upsize my needles and size choice to compensate. The yarn is merino and silk (and machine washable!) and luscious. It is a free pattern from the blog of f.pea -- Supernatural Stripes.
I also got buttons yesterday for the Debbie Bliss sweater. With any luck I'll get them sewn on today and can wear it this week.Other things accomplished this weekend are purchasing and installing a new phone (one with an answering system and big letters/numbers and a flashing light for missed calls - unlike the very cheap one we bought in November to replace the one whose display had ceased to function) and hanging our framed prints of Rocky Mountain College on the stair wall. Things not (yet) accomplished include doing my laundry and doing the bills :) But, I think I'll go rip out that baby sweater and start over.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
(Fairly) Well Traveled
visited 31 states (62%)
Create your own visited map of The United States or website vertaling duits?
I found this nifty map on another blog and just had to do my own!
And, another one:
visited 8 states (3.55%)
Create your own visited map of The World or Free ipad travel guide
Monday, January 2, 2012
A New Year - A Clean Slate
I think one of the reasons I am driven to state new year's resolutions each year is because of the way the stress of the holidays seems to bring out all the worst in me. It is all self-imposed -- I try too hard to control everything around me: the gifts, the decorations, the timing, the food, the "arrangements." My most interesting insight came "on the mat" at yoga; the more out of control we feel, the more we tend to try to control things. Bingo!
This year, I am adopting a New Year's Resolutions approach offered by a blogger (thanks to my friend Lisa to pointing it out on her Facebook page). Chris Brogan encourages people to come up with 3 words to "help you define your goals and experiences for the coming year." I've been mulling that over since last night and have had lots of ideas but hope to settle on my three words here today.
Release.
There is a lot I need to let go of this year. I have a number of habits that don't serve me well, including habits of thinking. I need to lessen my reliance on my inner critic (which has a very loud and insistent voice). I also need to let go of "things" and "stuff" (but, not yarn or fabric!). My mother continues to worry about things that she had to give up in the move out of their house and I want to pare down the "stuff" I have so that we are actually using more of what we own and open up some "space" in our lives. And, I need to keep working on letting go of my sons as they finish college and go out into the world on their own. I currently hold on by being their chief source of income. Even though I'm very careful about not being a controlling funder, I am so looking forward to not having the responsibility of providing funds and caring about their use. While I'm looking forward to the financial respite, I'm most looking forward to the mental and emotional respite. So, this is a year of releasing bad habits, extra stuff, and parental "control."
Presence.
Being fully present (another yoga mantra) is another goal for me this year. This, to me, means several different things. For one thing, it means not putting things off or letting them stack up. Deal with them now. It also means being thankful for gifts in my life and expressing it. And, it has to do with parenting again. As a college career counselor, I know fully well how anxious seniors and their families are at this time of year and I want to try not to let my fears mount about the future for my sons. And, my cats are always a good reminder of what it means to live in the moment -- here's one taking advantage of the heat being on as the basket she is in lives on top of one of our radiators.
Planning.
Yes, I want to be fully here in the present, but I also know that the easiest way to enjoy that presence is to spend some time planning. My calendar is my friend -- knowing what is ahead of me during the week, for example, helps me to prepare my mind and emotions so that I can be present in the moment as the week goes on. I also need to act on last year's resolution to work on more carefully defined financial planning for retirement.
So, those are my three words for 2012. Release. Presence. Planning.
I actually started working on these before I was able to settle on my words.
I cleaned out a corner cupboard in our living room where I've been collecting glassware and teapots and vases and "stuff" for years. I hated to open it for fear that things would fall out and break, but also hated looking at it. I pulled everything out, boxed up things that my son wants to adopt, boxed up things for the church fair or a yard sale, washed almost everything off and rearranged what was left. Release.
I purchased hanging file frames and assembled them in preparation for starting to go through boxes and boxes of paper to pare it down to records and information I need to keep. There have been a few uncomfortable moments in the past year when I couldn't find information I needed because my current filing system is just archeological layers of paper, much of which I don't need to retain at all. I also read an article in Better Homes and Gardens about how to keep paper from piling up (in the January issue - not yet on their web site) and adapted it to my needs. I have a file box and a basket on the table where paper usually piles up. When I open the mail or bring home receipts, I'll put them in the files to be dealt with either mid-month or at my usual end-0f-month bill paying date. Planning.
And, I'm allowing myself to enjoy the feeling that this year is off to a great start in many, many ways. Presence.
I'm currently concentrating on finishing a number of knitting projects before beginning anything new. I've got two sweaters that need to be sewn together and I shouldn't start on a new sweater until I've got those two done. Really.
Christmas knitting is nearly done :) I still have two pattern repeats to do on Julie's Japanese Vines scarf. Zeben has advised me to make it long and since I don't know what I'd do with a leftover half ball of this yarn, I guess I'll just keep going until it is used up. Blocking it will make it a little shorter, but she is taller than I am, so I'm sure what feels long to me will be just right for her.
And, on this gray day, here's a bit of color to brighten us up:
Happy New Year!
This year, I am adopting a New Year's Resolutions approach offered by a blogger (thanks to my friend Lisa to pointing it out on her Facebook page). Chris Brogan encourages people to come up with 3 words to "help you define your goals and experiences for the coming year." I've been mulling that over since last night and have had lots of ideas but hope to settle on my three words here today.
Release.
There is a lot I need to let go of this year. I have a number of habits that don't serve me well, including habits of thinking. I need to lessen my reliance on my inner critic (which has a very loud and insistent voice). I also need to let go of "things" and "stuff" (but, not yarn or fabric!). My mother continues to worry about things that she had to give up in the move out of their house and I want to pare down the "stuff" I have so that we are actually using more of what we own and open up some "space" in our lives. And, I need to keep working on letting go of my sons as they finish college and go out into the world on their own. I currently hold on by being their chief source of income. Even though I'm very careful about not being a controlling funder, I am so looking forward to not having the responsibility of providing funds and caring about their use. While I'm looking forward to the financial respite, I'm most looking forward to the mental and emotional respite. So, this is a year of releasing bad habits, extra stuff, and parental "control."
Presence.
Being fully present (another yoga mantra) is another goal for me this year. This, to me, means several different things. For one thing, it means not putting things off or letting them stack up. Deal with them now. It also means being thankful for gifts in my life and expressing it. And, it has to do with parenting again. As a college career counselor, I know fully well how anxious seniors and their families are at this time of year and I want to try not to let my fears mount about the future for my sons. And, my cats are always a good reminder of what it means to live in the moment -- here's one taking advantage of the heat being on as the basket she is in lives on top of one of our radiators.
Planning.
Yes, I want to be fully here in the present, but I also know that the easiest way to enjoy that presence is to spend some time planning. My calendar is my friend -- knowing what is ahead of me during the week, for example, helps me to prepare my mind and emotions so that I can be present in the moment as the week goes on. I also need to act on last year's resolution to work on more carefully defined financial planning for retirement.
So, those are my three words for 2012. Release. Presence. Planning.
I actually started working on these before I was able to settle on my words.
I cleaned out a corner cupboard in our living room where I've been collecting glassware and teapots and vases and "stuff" for years. I hated to open it for fear that things would fall out and break, but also hated looking at it. I pulled everything out, boxed up things that my son wants to adopt, boxed up things for the church fair or a yard sale, washed almost everything off and rearranged what was left. Release.
I purchased hanging file frames and assembled them in preparation for starting to go through boxes and boxes of paper to pare it down to records and information I need to keep. There have been a few uncomfortable moments in the past year when I couldn't find information I needed because my current filing system is just archeological layers of paper, much of which I don't need to retain at all. I also read an article in Better Homes and Gardens about how to keep paper from piling up (in the January issue - not yet on their web site) and adapted it to my needs. I have a file box and a basket on the table where paper usually piles up. When I open the mail or bring home receipts, I'll put them in the files to be dealt with either mid-month or at my usual end-0f-month bill paying date. Planning.
And, I'm allowing myself to enjoy the feeling that this year is off to a great start in many, many ways. Presence.
I'm currently concentrating on finishing a number of knitting projects before beginning anything new. I've got two sweaters that need to be sewn together and I shouldn't start on a new sweater until I've got those two done. Really.
Christmas knitting is nearly done :) I still have two pattern repeats to do on Julie's Japanese Vines scarf. Zeben has advised me to make it long and since I don't know what I'd do with a leftover half ball of this yarn, I guess I'll just keep going until it is used up. Blocking it will make it a little shorter, but she is taller than I am, so I'm sure what feels long to me will be just right for her.
And, on this gray day, here's a bit of color to brighten us up:
Happy New Year!
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