Thanks, Gratefully Received

I had a lovely weekend, starting with Friday afternoon. It is reunion weekend at Colby and alumni from the 1st and 10th reunion classes made a point of stopping by to see me and thank me for the help I've given them over the years. One is now, after admitted ups and downs in her life, settled into work that she loves and excels at in disability services. She commented that I "helped her more than you know" through our conversations while she was a student and several phone calls throughout her first post-Colby job search. The second young man graduated last year and hopes to apply to medical school in another year or two. He spent a lot of time worrying about his future while he was a student (but, fortunately, also made connections with two of us in the Career Center and got lots of support), went out and did a year-long volunteer/teaching position and said he "learned a lot" in his first year out of Colby. He seems much, much more self-confident and centered than when I last saw him a year ago and is off on a new work adventure this fall.

Then, on Saturday, I attended a memorial service for a cherished faculty member who passed away last fall. It was really nicely done and I ran into some past classmates from my year and the year behind me (it isn't my reunion year). Then I took a stroll down Roberts Row (aka Frat Row) where I know that the one-year reunion class hangs out. It is always like stepping back in time -- students aren't allowed to do this nowadays, but in my day (oh I sound old!), this was a familiar scene: beer die tables and kegs and other games going on and people hanging out on a sunny day. I got all the way to the end of the crowd before I came across some really familiar faces, but then got to talk with two of my pre-med alums who will be going to medical school next fall who graduated a year ago. They were glowing with the experiences they've had during this past year and with the excitement of what lies ahead for them. They were both people I (strongly) encouraged to take that year before going back to school and they thanked me for pushing them to do that. One laughed at how she used to be insistent when talking with me about how she wanted to go directly on to school and said that this past year was the "best year of her life" and thanked me for encouraging her in that direction.

These are the experiences that keep me wanting to do the work I do. Yes, I love the daily interactions (at this time of the year, mostly e-mail and phone conversations), but seeing the results of my efforts and care with students pay off is so rewarding and confirming. I feel privileged to work with students who are going through this complex, often frightening and overwhelming developmental stage. I often want to put my arms around them and tell them they'll be OK (and sometimes I do offer that hug and those words) in ways they can't even imagine. I can't guarantee there won't be ups and downs, but reassure them that even their classmates who appear to have everything together will have ups and downs too. And, they won't stop learning and growing just because they graduate from college. This weekend, I got to see some of this in real life and it makes me excited about going back to work tomorrow.

So, if someone has helped you along the way in college -- reach out and tell them. It truly makes a difference. And, if you haven't yet reached out to someone at your college (you know who you are), know that there are people (yes, even "administration" staff as well as faculty) just waiting for you to ask for their support and help. Take advantage of their caring and their wisdom. If the first person you reach out to doesn't "connect" with you, find someone else. You don't have to figure everything out on your own, though you have to live what you decide to do. Having a supportive older person in your life can help you move in whatever direction you head with confidence. "Real life" is actually a really nice place to live.